Strange relationship....

I have an interesting relationship with my ex. Technically, we are not divorced, we have been legally separated for 5 years. During the winter, he didn't get his utilities paid, and had them shut off. I felt sorry for him, and invited him to sleep on my couch. You have to realize that R and I are very good friends. We get along famously, as long as we are not living together. We have done all right this time, as long as he knows this is my house, I make the rules.
Hawk used to tease me about having my own sub, and I just blew that off, but recently...
Recently I have been trying little things that use that idea, and they work very well. R and I have renewed our sexual relationship, sporadically, and he seems to respond well to me "giving the orders". Although I am still at the receiving end of the paddle and crop, I tell him what to do... It is a very strange relationship, but it seems to work... In the bedroom, at least. I can't seem to rationalize the way he lives otherwise... My house has been packed full of his "junk". He is a pack rat, and is totally comfortable living in a dump... It is a constant fight for me to keep his "dump" from taking over my home... I like open spaces, and a "not really lived in" look... Its a major contention between us...He only shaves once a week, rarely gets a hair cut, doesn't care what his clothes look like... We are just so different, we can not live together, but the sex has always been good...LOL...
He has just in the last two weeks been working at a new job that pays much better than his last one, and is soon to be moving back into his rental house. He has asked me if our sexual relationship will continue, and even though I am not sure its a good idea, its just so damn convenient...
So maybe it will, maybe it won't.... Maybe I should just keep this up and not look for someone that fits my needs any better... Maybe IM being unrealistic in thinking I can find someone better... I really don't know...*sigh*...